long story short [intro]
im 18 days away from adulthood. nearly 18 years of experience is wat i have. in those 18 years, i have come to realize that i know and understand a tad more than the average 18 yo. and that even that is not a big deal. looking back on my 18 years of life, i can easily point out good times and bad times. i can distinguish between periods of happiness and despair. and while in reality there is no way these periods could possibly be that that long, i do realize that my experiences have been extrenely emotionally intense and draining.
one such span has recently sparked up. it started 7 years ago in my 7th grade english class and has snow balled for the past 7 years. i was 11 years old and had never been in love. here i am now at nearly 18 years old, writing about a girl 200 miles away that i havent seen or physically spoken to in over 6 months. if every one has that one erson that melts their heart at the mere mention of their name, she is that girl for me.
so wats so special about this story jon? why shud i read it? well u’ve read this far… u might as well keep going.
so middle skool had its drama [whoever didnt hav drama in middle skool was probably either causing it or a loser… haha] and we went to different high skools. but we had both acknowledged that we loved each other. fast forward to sophmore year of hs. she’s pregnant. and i find myself wishing i was the father [no, we have never even kissed… so stop trying to get 5 from 2+2]. jump to 2006, when she transfers to my skool and i see her daily. jump to summer ’07 when i tell her i never stopped loving her.
[its weird. this blog has no flow or form watsoever. mikulics would be disgusted.]
she told me she felt the same way. my heart jumped. we were thrilled. then reality smacked us both across the face. she was in a relationship. a very happy one. i was in a relationship. a very happy one. i decided to make a move. she decided i was too much of a risk. there were too many factors involved for her. her ‘fiance’, her family, and especially. her daughter.
love sux. period. whether ur married, engaged, dating, single, or just hit puberty. but it sux even more when the odds are against you. when u feel that hope is a fool’s blind attempt to ignore reality.